Disaster waiting to happen, any advice on how to contain the brewing storm?

I grew up in a really awful situation. My mother was extremely abusive and tormented me growing up. Things got so bad my mind couldn't take it, blacked out after witnessing a friend get hit by a semi, and I can only recall things that had either the strongest emotional effect on me or trivial things like what my teacher's name was in first grade. I could remember faces of people, know my relation to them, but I couldn't remember anything I had done with them or what they were like. Because they expected me to, I began to act a certain way and sorta became someone who wasn't really me when around a whole lot of people. At the end of May last year, I went to the police station and was laughed at, but a DHS lady was kind enough to help me out. I was seriously messed up in the head and wasn't exactly what people would refer to as 'sane'. I started school, met a really good friend of mine who helped me find myself although he didn't really mean to. We get along great, and have for the entire time we've known each other. He's almost everything I look for in a guy. I've only had three relationships, one with a perv who slept with my mother in 8th grade, one in 9th who wanted to be with me because I reminded him of a little girl because of how short I am, and at the end of 9th grade who turned out to be a stalker. I've only ever held hands with a guy, that's as far as I let any of those relationships go. Period. Now, I'm with someone who's become my best friend. He's shown me all kinds of things, taught me more about my Native American heritage, helped me get in touch with my tribal side, taught me myths and stories of old from all over the world, and he helped me find my sanity. He asked me out a little over a week ago, and I'm proud to say he's my boyfriend. Unfortunately, he's staying with his mother in another state for most of the summer. I completely understand, and I don't mind to much. Although I'm a year older than him and I am his first official girlfriend, our families both don't seem to mind. I currently live with my dad and step mom, by the way. I've spent some time with his family, and I really enjoy it so we're fine with that situation. My problem seems to be me. Although he seems to see all this wonderful stuff about me, as I see in him, I still have this innate ringing in the back of my mind that this won't turn out well. Something bad has to happen. I know that there is a very slim chance that we won't last forever like most insane couples seem to believe in High School, but something in my gut says we might. He matches me better than anyone I've ever met. Yet, because of my upbringing and how I grew up in such chaos, my mind seems to think that this will all be for nothing. I can't bring my mind to stop the pessimism and it's driving me insane. He knows about my past, we've discussed it many times, and I've told him my worries and fears. He knows I'm not normal and that my head is still partially warped, and he doesn't mind. He says it makes me who I am, and asked me to simply lean on him. I really want to, but I've fallen in love only once and the situation ended rather badly due to he was more of a child mentally and pretended to be someone he wasn't to get my attention. My feelings were genuine, not a child's crush. I was hurt, and now I'm afraid to love again. Yet, he knows everything, and we've talked about so many things through text since he's as shy as I am and doesn't want anyone overhearing our conversations. We talk everyday, and he knows that all I can see is this ending badly. He understands and always makes me feel better, but when he falls asleep, my mind falls back into the pattern. I don't see myself as good enough for him, but he does. He says sweet things, and asks that I trust him, which I do. I just don't know if I trust myself not to ruin this relationship. Any advice on what in the world I can do to keep myself together? If anything, I want to keep him if I can. There's just something about us, and coming from someone who's extremely analytical about people who best fit with each other and has played match maker a dozen times over for friends and got it right for quite a few years and is only messed up because the other got distracted and regretted it, things just fit. I was born on a full moon, he on a new moon. We have similar personalities and tastes, yet we have enough differences to maintain interesting conversations to the point we never bore each other at all. I can see, so long as neither of us messes with it by doing something we'll later regret, us being together for a long time. And I did step out of my own shoes and pretend to be a third party viewer. I'm only typing this after learning that for the past year we've both had a similar mindset about one another. I simply want to